Feeling Low

I'll be honest, I'm having a hard time keeping it together. All of a sudden, starting this past Monday, I've been feeling pretty blue. I'm getting the same amount of sleep, eating the same food, and basically living on the same schedule. I don't feel like myself however.

I've never felt low for more than a day. I'm praying for strength and happiness, and attempting to lift my own spirits, but it's been really hard. In the morning, I just feel like going back to bed -- for the rest of the day -- and shutting out the day's duties. I realize that's not an option right now though, so I'm trucking along.

I'm lucky to have a few friends/co-workers in my life that are positive and care about my well-being. They try to bring me up but also respect my space. If I don't feel different soon, however, I'll need to seek medical advice.

This is hard for me because I consider myself to be a pretty upbeat person. It just seems so much harder than usual to crack a smile or enjoy a funny story. Sure, there could be a medical explanation for it, but it's not something I'm familiar or even comfortable with.

Rather than mope around not sharing my feelings, however, I wanted to at least write about what's going on in my life, as I've done for the other 317 days of the year. I have faith that things will get better, so I'll keep on keeping on the best that I can. I sure do need a holiday though...

Re-Ringed

After more than a year of my wedding and engagement rings being too big to wear (properly), I can finally say they fit! I dropped them off last week at a goldsmith to get sized and just picked them up after work today. Look:

It's strange to wear them both again. I was able to wear the wedding band, but it was so loose that I feared losing it down the drain when washing my hands. Scary, and definitely not worth wearing it if I could possibly never see it again.

I have to say that I was quite surprised when my fingers shrunk at all. When it comes to ring sizes, mine was a 5 before losing weight. Now it's about 4 1/2 or so. That's pretty small. So small that I often can't buy rings "off the rack" as the smallest they come in is 5. At least my middle and index fingers are larger. Yet again, I don't wear rings other than these so why do I care!?

The best part of my rings fitting: it's nice to be "married" again. haha.

Cold Nights

Have you noticed how, most of the time, the temperature drops after a snowfall? I tried to consult Wikipedia to understand why this happens, but I only found this one line:

The small temperature change from before to after a snowfall is a result of the heat transfer between the snowpack and the air.

Yeah, okay... But seriously, it DOES change. Last night we went out to see the movie "Flight" starring Denzel Washington. It was definitely worth going to see, so please do! It started to get quite cold before we went out, and I knew that it was past time to get my car's block heater cord out so I could plug in. By the time we left the theatre it was -16C. That's without the wind chill, however, so I figure it probably dropped a few more last night and felt closer to -30C. Paul was able to plug my car in for me and I had no issues in the morning.

It's strange, though, as just a couple days ago it was closer to -5C during the day. The forecast for this week is suggesting highs of -2 or -3C. The up and down can really get to you, but as long as you dress appropriately, anything can be handled.

I'm definitely happy to be in the warm house when it's cold and windy outside, but in the afternoon if it's calm and the sun is shining, there's nothing better than a snowy winter day.

Lest We Forget

I don't have any personal ties to the military, but I truly appreciate the men and women that so dutifully serve our country. Until I worked in Shilo for three years, I never really understood the lifestyle. I now have a greater respect for the military, and for the families, and want to stop for a moment to remember them.

I really like the John McCrae poem, "In Flanders Fields", so I'm sharing it here:

In Flanders fields the poppies blow

      Between the crosses, row on row,

   That mark our place; and in the sky

   The larks, still bravely singing, fly

Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago

We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,

   Loved and were loved, and now we lie

In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:

To you from failing hands we throw

   The torch; be yours to hold it high.

   If ye break faith with us who die

We shall not sleep, though poppies grow

In Flanders fields.

Lest we forget those today on November 11th...

Saskatoon Coziness

It might have been snowin' and blowin', but we were very motivated to get the heck outta town on Saturday. City roads are always worse than highways, so we braved the winter weather for a night away from home.

Other than getting a little stuck in the parking lot of the kennel Casey stays at, we had an uneventful drive to Saskatoon. A stop in Davidson for a Subway lunch made a nice break, and we made it into the city in good time. We were able to check into our room right away and get to looking around. The hotel was nice (Radisson) and we felt very cozy. We even got a room on the 15th floor with a view of the river. I was very pleased.

I was very smart in getting a hotel right downtown as we were able to park the car in the heated underground lot and just walk where we needed to go. The mall was literally three blocks away.

After spending all my husband's hard-earned money on some beautiful boots and Lululemon gear, we spent a short while in the hotel hot tub. There were plenty of kids around and the the tub wasn't the greatest, but we relaxed in the warmth, inside from the wintery wind.

Dinner consisted of some good 'ol pub food (nachos, chicken fingers and fries) at a warm and cozy Irish bar a few blocks from the hotel. We left full but happy. I would totally go back there again.

I fell asleep early after a busy but fun day. The bed was cozy (see a theme here?) and there were plenty of pillows to go around (Paul always bugs me about my pillows). I'm really glad we were able to get out of town and have some quality time together, that's for sure.

Winter Whiteout Woes

It appears that winter has officially arrived. Or rather, it has reared its ugly head and declared, "enough of that grass crap, Prairies. It's time to cover your world with SNOW!" I've said it before, I quite like winter, especially the snow part. This time, however, I'm quite peeved that it decided to arrive today.

Last year on this same weekend, Paul and I traveled to Edmonton for a short weekend away. We had a lot of fun at the mall and got to get some quality time in together. It was short, but sweet. This year we decided to just get away to Saskatoon for an overnight. I planned this a few months ago. The hotel is booked and we've been looking forward to just getting away from the pets and the usual distractions. That was until the snowstorm hit.

We still plan on leaving tomorrow morning, dropping Casey off at the Playground first. I'll pray before bed that it dies down, and get up early to check the road reports. If they say anything other than "Closed", we'll go. Even if it's still windy and lightly snowing, we'll go. The only reason we'll decide to stay here is if it's whiteout conditions. In that case, our backup plan is to still get out of the house and stay overnight at the Delta (thanks to my darling sister and her Family Rate booking capabilities).

Regardless of what God/Mother Nature has bestowed upon us, I'm still looking forward to the weekend ahead. I expect lots of relaxing, shopping, and some delicious food and drink are ahead!

Left Out

Have you ever found yourself to be the lone person in a group that wasn't invited to a major event for someone else in the group? I didn't expect to, but it seems that the time has come. A co-worker is getting married and it appears that, expect for the new girls, I'm the only one that's left out in the cold.

I'm not friends with this person, but have tried to be. I don't know why, but we've never connected. Maybe it's her, maybe it's me. Either way, we say little to each other and don't have to due to our job responsibilities. It doesn't mean that I wouldn't feel singled out if I wasn't invited to her upcoming nuptials.

Said wedding happens to be this Saturday. She's already on leave to prepare, but a few other co-workers keep talking about the weekend right in front of me. Don't they realize I wasn't invited? Are they just so unprofessional that they don't have the respect to talk about it out of my earshot? Honestly, I'm not entirely offended to not be invited; the issue is the other people around me that appear to have a lack of regard for my feelings.

I don't care what the plans for the weekend are. I don't care what you're wearing or what you still need to buy for your outfit. I also don't care to hear about what happens at the wedding when you come to work on Tuesday gabbing about it. I don't want to see pictures or hear how good the food was. I would like you to please take any talk about it away from my area so I don't have to get upset.

There is only one person I feel comfortable expressing my feelings over this situation to, but only because they are one of the "new girls" who also was not invited. She agrees that it's disrespectful and wouldn't blame me for calling in sick on Tuesday. I won't actually do that, but I sure feel like it.

Congrats to the happy couple, but it would have been nice to at least get a "courtesy invite" so I could have the chance to decline... because I would have.

TOPS Hurrah

My "reign" as Weight Recorder of TOPS SK 2765 Regina has come to an end. Officially, and quite satisfyingly. I already feel like myself again, mingling with the members and getting to play a different role. Although I believe I will probably sit on the executive again at some point in the future, I know that it will be in a very different capacity and I'll not feel "weighed down" -- pardon the pun -- by it.

We had a great night also. There were lots of awards to give out to the big losers, and we celebrated some fabulous successes. I even got to take home some fruit for achieving one of the top spots for the month. I was very happy to congratulate my friends for a job well done one and hand them their prizes one last time.

I hope our group continues on positively, regardless of what may come in the future. It's no secret that we've grown to capacity, and that time seems to be of the absolute essence. I'm having fun being there though, so I support my group in all areas.

I'm really looking forward to the next few months, with a Christmas party, a new year, and then the annual instillation. It shall be interesting, that's for sure!

Being Charitable

If you haven't noticed, it's that time of year again when the charities are out looking for donations. Whether it's door-to-door canvassers for the MS or Cancer Society, or United Way through payroll deductions, we can start feeling that pressure to GIVE once again.

At work, it's often like they think we're made of money, just because of who we work for. Not only does "Jeans Day for Charity" cost $5 per Friday (or $20 for five weeks), but there are 50/50 draws all the time, and NFL pools, and sick kids and spouses... and the list goes on! It almost makes me feel angry that they keep asking for my money all the time. I'd like to give, but I can't give to everyone.

My neighbour across the street just happens to canvass for the Canadian Diabetes Association every fall. She came by this evening saying, "it's that time of year again!". No kidding. I obviously welcomed her in and promptly whipped out my checkbook. I'm not usually so eager, but since I can afford it, I'll just donate a little. Honestly, I do have a hard time saying no to someone that I may actually get to know better for being neighbours; if it was a stranger, it would be easier to say, "no thanks". At least it was for the C.D.A. and I have a personal connection with the disease (my uncle was diagnosed once, and right away started working on himself to make it go away).

I think we all have personal connections with certain charities and feel more willing to open our wallets for them. It definitely can get overwhelming though, so you simply have to pick your favourites and just stick to a budget. At least charitable donations are tax deductible...

Performance Perfection... okay, not quite.

You know I hate to toot my own horn (yeah, right) but this is the first year since I started my career in 2007 that I feel entitled to receive a high score on my annual performance review. Not only have I rolled with the punches (regularly), but I've become very adept in my technical abilities with our system and well-versed in most areas of our payroll processing.

The only payroll course I'd taken pre-current job was a basic payroll course in college way, way back in 2005. I only took it because the curriculum required me to, in order to give me my diploma. Otherwise, I would NOT have taken that course. Well, in hindsight, I'm really glad I did. I may not have used a heck of a lot of payroll knowledge in my previous employment, but it was enough to get me into my current job and I'm very happy for that.

Once I got my new job in 2010, I took the opportunity to enroll in payroll courses right away. Not only would they pay for it, but I'd be able to further my career just by taking them. A year later, I had completed the required courses for my Payroll Compliance Practitioner (PCP) certification. I feel pretty spectacular about that, actually, and I'm not ashamed to say so.

Since then, I've grown a lot in my new role. I'm training new employees, taking on new tasks with more responsibility, providing guidance and leadership to my team, and enjoying myself while doing so. I completed my personal review this morning and really had to contemplate the reason for marking myself so high. In the past I've always been cautious about doing so, because I'd rather mark myself low and be surprised by a higher grade from my manager later on. This time, however, I feel differently and hope they do too.

At least I can attempt to sell myself and justify why I feel I'm so awesome. Gotta try it and see!

Agility Anxiety

Casey and I started up another Agility class this afternoon. It's been quite a while since the last time -- about a year -- and I had a bit of anxiety going into it. Casey is a purebred terrier, through and through, and we've had our struggles in the past due to her born nature. I've always remained open to new techniques, however, and hoped that eventually Casey would settle down and focus on the task rather than the distractions around her.

Within moments of the class starting, I knew the trainer meant business. I was worried at first, but quickly understood that if I listened to her pointers and did as I was told, we'd get along just fine. It's like train-the-trainer, and I'm okay with that! Casey had some issues at the beginning due to her excitement level, and the fact that it's been so long since the last time. She did quickly get the hang of it and remembered the commands, such as "tunnel" and "jump".

The issues only began when she got territorial with other dogs. She loves all dogs; they're not the issue. The problem is that she thinks that when she's with me (or any other female authority figure that she perceives to be "hers"), she gets very angry when other dogs show an interest in me or I in them. The trainer noticed this right away and we actually got to work on it. I was completely open to her taking over, especially as she was forthcoming with me in that she told me I may think the treatment was harsh. Honestly, she's the professional so I must have an open mind when it comes to training my terrier. I don't know what to do, she does, so I was more than happy to allow her to take the leash and attempt to get Casey straightened out. She definitely was affected, and we're going to keep working on it. The advice I received will be put into practice so that we can move on and fix this little issue of ours.

We have next week off due to Remembrance Day, but we'll be at it for another five weeks starting the following Sunday. I'm looking forward to Casey getting better at the obstacles and us developing a better relationship. It does get emotional for me a bit when she acts up, but I have to remember that it's for her good that we don't allow her bad behaviour to be accepted. In time I have faith that we'll be a strong team, even competing in fun agility events. And hey, I was sweating by the end of the class so it's a good workout for me too :p

TOPS Tallying and Thanks

Wow, I am really, really, really happy to be done as Weight Recorder. I will say it one more time: it's not that I couldn't do it, I simply don't want to anymore. I had a few errands to run in the morning, and then my entire afternoon was dedicated to tallying up the month's awards and calculating the results of the last contest. I didn't want it to take me all afternoon, but it did.

With over fifty active members, it sure is a big job. I truly appreciate the work that goes into doing it, and value the next person that's taking it over. I hope she enjoys it as much as she said she did in the past!

I love my TOPS peeps, and I'll get to award them one more time on Wednesday with the October results. There's lots of great work being done in the group so I'm happy to be able to share it with them once more. I'm even more happy to be able to get to know them better in the coming weeks and months.

Thank you for appreciating the work I did these last seven months. It's no easy task and I'm glad you realize it. I look forward to seeing you all soon!

Snow Smiles

Yet another busy Friday at work, and yet another Friday that a co-worker is sick. Hmm. Obviously I won't name names, but it definitely bothers me that they continually are "sick". It's not even due to the cold or flu, but rather self-inflicted through choice of foods. I'll leave it at that.

I was busy though, and it's good to be. It's never nice to be bored, especially on a Friday when all you want to do is go home and relax. I even had a massage halfway through the day over my lunch hour, to break up the time and, of course, to incur some painful pleasure! It was misty outside when I went into the therapist, and when I left, the snow was falling quite rapidly. The temperature must have dropped one degree, as it seems that's all it took to change the wet stuff into white stuff.

I was prepared at 4:30 with my pink snowbrush, and although the roads were very icy and it took longer to get home, it was a great feeling to be done the week. I've said it before, I really like winter so, although treacherous roads are not desirable, the fluffy, beautiful snow is. It's almost as if my world became cozier after a soft blanket covered the earth. Sure, shovelling's no fun, and neither is being cold, so I stay warm and burn some calories cleaning my driveway. Enough said!

The weekend may be filled with errands and organizing, but at least the snow cover will make me smile while I keep busy.

Thursday?!

Wow, what a strange, frustrating, emotional, overwhelming day. There will always be the occasional day like this, but it's so exhausting when it happens. At least it ended off with a tasty thin crust pizza and a delightful mom-chat.

The good news is, Paul's cold is slowly getting better. He still wakes me up in the night coughing, which doesn't help an overall bad day, but it too shall pass.

Did you hear what's in the forecast? I hope it's not like this...

Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween! I'm going to share a few more photos with my blog-reading friends. This one is blurry, but I like it. I look skinny too, so bonus!

Hit Girl

And this is me at a different party the next night with the blue Crayola crayon, making my signature pouty face.

Crayon and Pirate 

And the last one, me "making friends"...

Hard to believe it's the same person in the purple wig, eh? :)

We chose not to hand out candy again this year due to Casey being too rowdy and barking at everyone and everything. Instead we closed the blinds, turned out the lights, blocked the way onto the deck, and went out for a nice dinner. Beer Bros. was quiet and cozy and we enjoyed some delicious fare. It was a good night. Now Halloween 2012 is over and I can start thinking about what I'll dress up as next year!

Survivor Pool

So I'm in a Survivor pool. I paid $20 and picked four people. The winner will not necessarily be the same person that picked the "sole survivor" as one of their four. There's a points system that gives and takes away points for things like competing in challenges, finding an idol, or quitting the game. The winner from last year is responsible for inputting the points each week. Approximately 25 people opted to join this particular pool, so my chances of winning aren't exactly high.

I started out in the first few weeks in third place; not too bad of a start. I'm really not sure how many weeks it's been now, but I've fallen to fifth. Actually, I'm in a five-way tie for fifth. That's worse. Sure, you never know what will happen in the game between now and the end, but I'm a little disappointed in how things are going. At least I only spent $20.

The game's not over yet, but team yellow is gonna have to ramp it up and returning player Johnathan needs to get voted off! Simple as that.

Hotel Harmony

Planning a little weekend away should be really easy. In fact, it would be if I wasn't the one planning it! I know what I want, kinda... sorta... I'm really not sure, actually. See?!

The issue is that I want to get a good hotel rate, but be in a great location. I have all these options for getting a good rate, like the Entertainment Book I purchased last year that offers hotel discounts, or even the Viterra discount. The seemingly simple task of choosing a nice hotel ends up being quite an involved process.

I already booked us a room at a particular hotel, but I don't really like the area and wouldn't mind spending a tad more to get a little more upscale experience. We're only spending one night and two days away as it is, so I want to be comfortable and yet within walking distance of all the cute little stores downtown.

The co-worker I've been carpooling with the last few weeks is from Saskatoon, so on the way home today I asked her for her opinion. I'm definitely going to look into the hotel she mentioned and see what things are close by. I value a good rating from someone that's been there, and I appreciate knowing someone that knows a lot more about the city than I do.

Regardless of where we end up sleeping, I'm looking forward to getting away from Regina for a few days. Especially the cats and dog. Sure, we love them to bits but the peace and quiet is long overdue. They can enjoy their own little weekend retreat at the same time anyway!

Snowy, Lazy Day

"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas..." Don't hate the messenger! I wasn't the one that made it snow! :p

Regina has seen quite the cold, blustery day today. Snow has been lightly falling since this morning, and the wind has a bite behind it. It's the kind of day where you just want to stay on the couch and do nothing. For the most part, I was able to do just that.

Mr. Paul is feeling better than yesterday, getting some energy back and looking forward to going to work tomorrow. We both agree that one day of doing nothing is fine, but two in a row usually turns out long and boring and completely unnecessary. Save for a few moments where I cooked Paul some meals, made a pot of chili, and ran through one load of laundry, I was a completely louse. The dog enjoyed that.

Although snow reminds me of Christmas, it doesn't mean that I am ready for it yet. As it happens every year, we anticipate it coming and then all of a sudden, poof it's over. I'm going to try and slow down time between now and then by appreciating each day, so that when Christmas actually comes, I'm able to be present for each and every moment.

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!

Party #2

Even after a near-meltdown over a costume malfunction pre-party, I was able to have a good time as a pirate last night. The house was completely decked out in Halloween decorations; apparently it takes them about nine days to set it all up each year. The hosts were amazing and lots of fun, interesting people attended. I'm sorry Paul couldn't come, but we'll definitely plan to attend next year.

I didn't get to take any of my own photos, but there were lots done by the party hostess. My co-worker said they usually post them all to a website for people to view. The most memorable parts of the night were:

-the massage chair in the "spider room"

-meeting a petite Asian-Latino dude who married a tall, blonde Polish-Ukrainian girl

-getting hit on by "Old Spice guy"

-the amazing riblets (nom nom nom)

-the zombie baby

I'm already looking forward to next year!

Kick-@$$

It's Saturday, but I'm writing this short blog for yesterday. Last night was Halloween Party #1: the 3rd Annual at the Koldyk's. It was definitely a better time than last year, even though I didn't enjoy my costume as much!

If you read this blog regularly, you know that I wasn't too thrilled about this year's costume choice. I really, really wanted to continue with our tradition of dressing as a couple or pair. Unfortunately for me, however, Paul decided to pick a character that's counterpart was NOT what I had envisioned  dressing up as. That said, I bought the costume anyway. Needless to say, albeit fairly comfortable overall, I really did not enjoy wearing the wig and mask. I was itchy all night. This is who we dressed as:

Kick-Ass and Hit Girl (from the movie "Kick-Ass")

This is how we looked:

Add caption

Not too shabby, right? Aaron Johnson and Chloe Moretz definitely have it going on, but we did alright for ourselves. Yes, I had an itchy head and face, but we got a good reaction from most people at the party.

We have #2 to attend on Saturday night, but Paul's not feeling too well with having a bad cough and some sniffles. I'll leave him at home and go with the girl from work that invited me. It also means I'll get to dress up more sexy, which is what I'd planned the whole time! Sure, I'll reuse a costume from last year, but it will be more comfortable. 

We had fun, met some new people, and enjoyed another Kick-Ass Halloween. :)